Monday, November 21, 2011

Live One Day At a Time!

Attempting heroism or doing something crazy is generally not our career option. Once in a blue moon, inspired by some historical figure and their achievements, we become inclined to take steps towards a change. Emotionally charged up by some brilliant quote, we dare to take a risk and set ourselves for a new challenge. We lay down goals, define objectives, strategize and gamble a little discomfort in our routine life. Some of us even risk  a chance of failure. We are all set and are ready to be successful.

While some of us are going to live up to the expectations, many of us will be washed up in failure. Disappointment follows us in every endeavour we chanced. We are fighters, we don’t give up that easily. So we will pick ourselves and move ahead, hoping to hit the goal some where along the road. In this journey, as we consistently encounter set backs, our resolutions weaken. Disillusionment kicks in. It hurts when we fail, it is really disheartening when the occurrence of malfunction is consistent. Even as we lose the grip on our resolutions, we hope and wait for ‘that one big’ opportunity. But even ‘that big one’ doesn’t present itself. Ultimately we throw the arms down and conclude, ‘May be, we are better the way we are now’. Why try hero stuff?

I think in entire process of heroes, stories, quotes, lessons, inspirations, emotional charges, resolutions, attempts, failures, bumping into walls, waiting for opportunities, experiencing failures again and finally giving up, we miss our biggest asset: TODAY. We utterly disregard the importance of living one day at a time.

Importance of Today

“Fact is we exaggerate yesterday, we overestimate tomorrow, and we underestimate today: People create success in their lives by focussing on today” – Equip

I generally write down everything I think for my blog in a note book. On it’s cover there is a simple statement, but I think it is very powerful. It says, “Today is the first day of the rest of your life”. It is absolutely true. Today is not only the first day, but it is the best day of your life, it is the big opportunity you have been waiting for, and it is the only day on which you can do something. Truth is, it is too late for yesterday, yesterday is gone. You can’t depend on tomorrow, you don’t know what tomorrow holds. Therefore you are left with Today, and what you do with today matters most. The way you choose to invest your time today directly affects your tomorrow.

No matter how much I write and encourage, all of it will not make sense to you, until you choose to believe in today. Not just to believe, but what you do with it is of great consequence. We will be able to make use of today effectively when we change our perspectives. Change should be brought about  both in our perspective of success and as well as in our perspective of problems in the path to success.

Success – Importance of Bits and Pieces

We generally have a faulty view of success, and that leads to underutilization of today. We believe success is impossible, or that it is luck or we associate it with hard work and attaining power, or we strive to achieve it through connections and recognitions and we fall flat on faces. Some may have created some sensation following those ideas, but eventually all the hype will die down in true light. Some of us have a slogan, repeating which we spend our entire life– “If Only…”

What we need to understand is that Success is relative. It is different for each person. You cannot live somebody else’s glory. All of us cannot become Abdul Kalam or Manmohan or Kiran Bedi or Aamir Khan. For one person, giving up a well paying job and pursuing film making is success; even if the first film fails. For another walking on to the dais in front of an audience of five colleagues and delivering a five minute introduction about himself is  success. For a chronic smoker, spending an entire day with a single smoke is success. For someone who is extremely shy, even asking a girl’s name is success. Success depends on what each person achieves day in and day out.

The secret behind many successful people is that they choose to live one day at a time. Instead of waiting for tomorrow’s big opportunity, and sitting in their cosy couch today, they choose to achieve something each day and then look forward to the next day. Something marvellous takes place with these kind of people. Everyday, success in small scales, in bits and pieces gets accumulated in their lives. Today’s success adds up to what that person achieves tomorrow and the cycle continues, till one day the culmination of all these would spell a Mahindra Singh Dhoni or Amartya Sen or YOU.

We suffer with destination disease. We convince ourselves that if we are supposed to be successful, then we will be. No, we are dead wrong.  We need to wake up and make choices today. Making right decisions and managing them daily is the formula of success. Success is in our daily agenda. Someone said, “Never postpone what you can do today to tomorrow. Chances are tomorrow never arrives.” If we can choose to develop a perspective that says, ‘I will achieve the best I can today and then wait for tomorrow’, we will make a difference in and through our lives. You can then attain what you have been dreaming all along.

Problem – Turn the Table Around

Journey to success is never easy. Hurdles, bumps and thorns are inevitable. We will encounter problems; a new crisis arises there, a complication shoots up here, unexpected issues take place among team members leading us to a frustrated state. It seems as if we are surrounded by more nuisance, than before the resolution. What used be a comfortable life before resolutions now turns into a complicated life. Our focus now moves from our actual goal to dealing with present problems. Objective becomes obscure and we are fending off troubles and trying to get out as quickly as possible. It is exactly there, we lose the battle. But that’s not what we want, is it?

Since problems are predictable, we must learn the art of facing problems. I suggest we learn to reframe our response-ability in order to increase our achieve-ability. Viktor Frankl was one among the millions of Jews, who had to endure the horrors of the holocaust. Nazis took everything away from them; even their names, and gave them numbers. Years after this horrific experience he writes, “Everything can be taken from a man but one thing: the last of human freedoms – to choose one’s attitude in any given set of circumstances.” The most important choice you make everyday is your attitude. Your perspective of problem decides whether or not you will be a victor.

In order to turn the table around as we encounter problems, we must learn two truths. These truths will help us to develop a new perspective of our problems, help us to look at them as opportunities instead of problems. The first truth is, adversity is often the seedbed of opportunity. Bad situations have a tendency to bring the best out of us. We get more creative, innovative and wise when we are thrown against a wall. Adversity can produce an increased capacity in us to become better people. We all want everyday to be a good day. But if all the days are good days, there would be no ‘good days’. Bad days help us to appreciate good days. The second truth is, getting what we wish for can result in unintended and undesirable consequences. A sociologist called Robert Merton calls this, the law of Unintended consequences. Do you remember the Greek mythological story, Midas Touch? Sometimes when things go wrong, be thankful because it might turn out be a blessing in disguise. These problems probably will save us from unintended consequences.

Once we understand these truths and reframe our perspective of problem, living one day at time becomes easy. We may not be able to face all the days and years together, but we can surely face one day at a time. My challenge to you is learn to live one day at a time. It is then failure won’t seem like a problem, hurdles are easier to cross, resolutions can be renewed, fears can be faced, giants can be forced to fall, and adventurous living can be a pleasure.

Let me finish my series with this short quote from an author called, Mark Batterson.

“Here’s what i have learned from personal experience: Sickness helps us appreciate health. Failure helps us appreciate success. Debt helps us appreciate wealth. And tough times help us appreciate the good times. That’s just the way life is. I’ve also learned that our worst days can become our best days.”

Until next time…learn to appreciate your problems.

1 comment:

  1. Hi anna,
    Just a thought.
    One is absolutely responsible for his/her own problems; to assume that these problems are going to be blessings in disguise sound slightly irrational.
    I like the way “understanding”, “truth” and “perspective” are closely interlinked with the “problem” aspect in the last section.
    Also, I infer from the post that a ‘perspective’ is ‘truth’ in itself. Yes. I agree to the point that we need to acquire real or newer perspective (tool) to understand the truth of a problem.

    ReplyDelete