Lost without a clue - 2

Life without a purpose either makes a person to loose all hope or loose all decency. Unfortunately for her, it was the later. She was the personification of vulgarity.

Her life was a complete mess. Well, through a series of bad choices, she ended up where she is now. She is a prostitute, whether by profession or by nature itself, is a mystery. Gomer was her name. Except for her father’s name, no one knows anything about her past. Who wants to know!!!!, when she has a gorgeous body to offer for a price.

Life probably has been cruel to her, so she learned from life and became cruel. There no more morals or values in her, no more principle to guide her. She got rid of them long ago. Why did she become a tramp is a question left unanswered. Whatever the reasons were, she did make a choice to become one.

It might have started with a pursuit of to finds love, only to wind up with a wrong lover. That one used her and left with a mark on her soul. In order to wipe away the stain, she decked herself with rings and jewelry and went after more lovers. Through a chain of heart breaks, string of relationships, faltering choices, she became who she is today. People forgot her name, they now know her as an adulterer, a tramp, pervert, harlot and a floozy.

In retrospect, isn’t that many of us lost our original names too. People call us with different names now. A cheat, scoundrel, addict, useless, thief, jerk, fool and list can go on.

Gomer does not care about it any more. Her soul became stone hard. If the world is going to pitiless, so shall she be. Everybody talks about her. Men whisper among themselves about their adventures with her, Women gossip about her cheap character. Everybody stares at her. Men measuring her body with their eyes, women with resentment and rage in their eyes. But nothing really bothers her any more, except somewhere in the corner of her heart, a haunting sense of impoverishment.

Gomer is a common name. In the Bible there are only two Gomers. One a male and the other is a female. The name in Hebrew language means ‘Completion’. What an oxymoron, her life is anything but complete! Deep within we also know that we are incomplete. From the exterior we look we are cheerful, the world around thinks we are blissful. But internally our souls are experiencing desiccation, a sense of dryness. We are searching for ways to break this mould, in which we are stuck, hunting for someone or something to set us free from this hell.

For Gomer, what started off as a single act of pleasing the lover has slowly curved into a source of luxury, which now became her Achilles' heel. Her body is addicted to sex, its like a drug that needs to be injected into her veins. She does not like it any more than we do, no prostitute is happy with her profession. She wants to change, she needs a change, but her flesh just would not listen. It craves for gratification. At the sight of men, especially men with loads of wealth, it pounds on to them like a hungry hyena.

The state of being obsessed with something is familiar to all of us. The cravings to pursue that which we really want to get rid of; the thirst for the unexplored and unknown is proverbial in our lives. Flesh is uncontrollable; it ignores the warnings of the mind. Reason fails to convince and we gleefully beg after that which destroys our soul.

While Gomer’s body pursues the forbidden, her spirit became senseless. Dry, parched and a desert likeness saturate her spirit now. She does not know where her life is going, its not that she care about it. She had no agenda, no purpose no sense of direction, no value for life. She is lost with out a clue.