Risk the chance of Failure

One of the biggest fears we face is, typically regarding our future. It is natural to experience fear when we suddenly lose our job, or told by doctors that our child is suffering from a rare bone disease or something like that. When our future is in jeopardy and we are unsure of what is next, we struggle to make decisions. We usually are careful in touching the water when it comes to those life altering decisions. It is natural and in a sense it is healthy. If we are not smart and careful with our life, we lose it for good. Yet some people can be really reckless and dumb in the way they deal with life and important decisions. But majority are sensible and judicious.

 

Being careful is one thing and living in fear is completely another thing. Most of us, while trying to be careful, allow the fear of future get the better of us. Entrapped by fear we feel motionless, life gets squeezed out of us. This uncertainty regarding future probably starts with loss of a job, but now spreads into all the areas of our life. We begin to panic even for trivial issues. That, I believe is unhealthy. Fear has monstrous power. It cripples growth, keeps people in helpless state. Loss of personal confidence, trust in others, developing phobias are inevitable effects of fear.

Disrupting Status Quo!

 

When we are inspired by the stories of great heroes, we make resolutions to follow them and achieve something, even if it is not as great as theirs. May be to pursue a dream career or purchase a beautiful beach house or at least sing in an office party. As we prepare ourselves to move towards that dream, strangely fear engulfs us, it grips our hearts and we begin to hesitate. Many times I wondered what could be the reason behind this vacillation. I suspect our indecision is not because we need to do something heroic, but because we need to do something different. Doing something different means we need to change what is regular. Change in routine, change in our status quo, change in what we are already comfortable with and we don’t like that.

 

Somehow change scares us to death. Disturbing a comfortable life is unpleasant. In an attempt to do something new, as long as change is not required we will be fine. If we feel confident that our future is secure, then we proceed. Doing something heroic then, is not a big deal. But the moment we realize our next step leads to a blind alley we hesitate, we take a back step. Disrupting the status quo is not our forte.

 

Let me open your eyes. Unless we are willing to change and attempt something we never did, we will never be able to achieve what we have never achieved. If you want to have something you never had, you need to do something you never did. Translation: TAKE A RISK!

 

Everyone is a risk taker.

Whether we realize it or not we are all risk takers. A Pastor in Houston talking about faith said something like this, “We all take risks everyday. When we have a fever we go to a doctor whose full name we cannot remember, he tells us that we have a disease, whose name we cannot pronounce, he then gives us a prescription, which we  cannot even read; we take that to a pharmacist, whom we have never met, he takes out and gives us a medicine, whose combination we cannot understand, but we go home, take it with a glass of water and go to bed peacefully, completely confident that we are going to be cured soon.”

 

Aren’t we all risk takers? Whatever we buy from the market, whether milk, water, cola, vegetables, oil, rice, everything is produced or manufactured by an unknown person, from an unknown location, with possibly unknown ingredients. Yet we purchase and use them without even thinking twice. Point is, we show tremendous trust in these unknown people concerning our daily needs. We are risk takers.

 

But then we are also people with fear. We are scared to take a vacation from a hectic job for the fear losing the job. Scared to leave a job and start a dream business, scared to move up in relationship and get married, sacred to invest in a new venture, scared to face up to an irritating boss, and scared of anything uncertain. That is why for many of us, life is a drag. It is futile, it’s frustrating. Dull.

 

Risk the chance of Failure

You might argue that buying a product at a supermarket is less riskier than leaving a job and starting a business. I don’t agree with that for one simple reason, a risk is a risk, small or big. When you pick a product from a shop, you believe it will work for you, irrespective of the final result. When you take a step towards an uncertain future you are doing the same, believing that it will work. Sometimes it might look stupid, but then an Indian Man buying a fairness cream to become a ‘gora’ is stupid.

 

I think the challenge is, some of us need to risk changing the jobs, leaving jobs, starting business, pursuing your heart, learn guitar, getting married, having children, buying a dream house or trying out “Dance India Dance” or “Indian Idol”. Don’t allow fear to swallow you up. Try smiling at your arch enemy at office, or tell you boss that he is wrong (If he is really wrong, otherwise, it’s a suicide and I am not responsible), or go back to college and finish graduation or propose to the girl you have always admired but never dared even to say hi, or try believing in God. Do something different from what you have been doing so far. I bet your life will take a whole new dimension.

 

Trying something new means we are also risking a chance of failure. Not everyone will be successful in their ventures. Some of us will fail, possibly for thousand reasons. Sometimes risk involves failure. Failure is not a bad thing, if we are willing to learn from our mistakes, rather than sulking. There are plenty of occasions where we fail even when we have not committed any mistake. External factors, circumstantial elements can work against us. Question is what have you lost? If we lost all the money we saved up, in one single new venture, we can always earn it back through other ways. Lost your job for a dream project? You got skills, you got guts, so you will find a new job. It probably might be better than the lost one. Opportunities present themselves to those who keep using them.

 

If you have not lost your life, you have lost nothing. Wealth can be earned back. Jobs can be found. Houses can be bought back. Everything is possible as long as we have life. I strongly believe, when our intentions are right and the path we choose is ethical and correct, we can always gamble a chance of failure. We won’t regret.

“If you think you are beaten, you are; If you think you dare not, you don’t; If you’d like to win but think you cant, it’s almost certain you won’t; Life’s battles don’t always go to the stronger and  faster men, but sooner or later, the man wins is the one who thinks he can.”

Next post we shall try to learn living for today.

Where do we lose the battle? - Disillusionment

Heroism inspires people. When we listen to the incredible story of Benaiah, who chased a lion on a snowy day into a pit and killed the lion, we are inspired. Or when we hear the three stories from the life of Steve Jobs, our hearts are moved and minds stirred. We will be challenged to fight our own battle with fierce courage and achieve what Benaiah or Steve did. These stories challenge us to become champions by staying hungry and foolish. Deep inside we want to be like them and do something monumental with our own lives. Therefore immediately, we make resolutions to imitate our heroes and follow the path they have taken and become victorious in our battles.

While some of us do taste success, many of us face bitter experience of failure. There might be thousand reasons for our failures. It could be lack of preparation; it might be wrong timing, or it could be incorrect method of execution and the list can go on. Many are disappointed or disheartened and they give up too soon. Some will try to follow through, but if they hit the wall more than once, they too conclude they are not hero material and that they are not made for this.

I suspect our resolutions weaken mainly for two reasons. In our pursual to achieve something great, we expect and wait for that one big opportunity that Steve Jobs, or David or Benaiah encountered in their own lives. Trouble is we ignore small opportunities every day. Trust me that big opportunity is never going to come to you, unless you use today’s small opportunity. Secondly, we are unwilling to change our status quo and risk something. Until we risk disrupting our present state and take the first step towards our dream we are not going anywhere.

As we begin to experience failures in our attempts to follow the footsteps of our heroes, the resolutions that are made at the beginning start to wither away. The initial fire, vigour, and passion dry up. We feel disillusioned and defeated. Some of us even feel we are cheated into imitating our heroes. As we cool down, and our fire turns lukewarm, our 'response-ability' gets toned down next time we hear same heroic act. That is, we don’t respond the same way we did at the beginning. Even though a person might be willing to learn from a story, the passion to put it into practice is washed up in failures.

Let me summarize what I have been exploring so far in last four posts. Adventures, heroism, courageous acts of our ancestors impact us to a great extent. They are needed and they need to be heard frequently. Sometimes in repeated hearing the effect gets lost. The effect caused by David’s epic battle with Goliath can be rationalised or played down showing the divine involvement as the source of success; Inspirations emanating from those stories can be ignored through indifference developed by our familiarity with the story; and repeated failures, in our attempts to live upto the challenges thrown at us by those heroic acts, can water down our resolutions and leave us disillusioned.

So what is the solution? How can we overcome these disadvantages and actually do something and inch closer to the elite club of achievers like David, Joseph, Peter or Paul?

Let me propose, what I believe are most effective, steps we need to take or skills we need to develop. They sound familiar but then they are sound.

1.       Unlearn ‘I Know’ attitude

2.       Risk the chance of failure

3.       Live one day at a time.

I'd like to take you through all of three of them in next few posts. Till then don’t let the fire go down.

“Your biggest competitor is your own view of future” – The Visionary’s Handbook